Author Archives: Zaya

How are you?

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To be honest with you. I feel like a brick has hit me in the face and that I am slowly drowning because I have bills to pay, I have homework to do, I have cleaning to do, and many more things to do before this year ends. I am not going to tell you any of this. I will lie to you and myself. I will say “I am doing swell” and I will asked you “How are you doing?” It is just an endless cycle of lies we tell each other. Until we meet again and do the same.

This year is different and harder from all the other years before. Every since the pandemic happened I opened the bottle that held my emotion and let the liquid pour out. I was tired of keeping it together, because every time I read the news xx amount of people died. I got scared because that was somebody’s love one, who croaked. Every time I looked at my bank account I was worried because how was I going to pay for groceries or rent if I did not get that six hundred dollars a week. How were businesses supposed to stay afloat if nobody had any money to spend?

I remember when this pandemic started I had my first break down going home after we to the grocery store, because I could not breath through my P100 mask and I thought to myself “Is this the new normal? Will I have to wear my mask every where for the next two years?” Stream of tears came out of nowhere. I dropped the bag of groceries on the cement side walk and just cried for a solid four minutes. That day was rough for me but lucky for me. My favorite person comforted me and let me eat ice cream for dinner because ice cream makes me happy.

After that break down on a side walk in public. I told myself I will be honest about my feelings because everybody feels the same now and I won’t get shame for feeling gloomy on a sunny day. 2020 has done us all wrong. I hope the end of year will be better than the beginning.

 

 

 

Birth Control

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Many women out there in the world are probably on their birth control journey or haven’t started it quite yet. For those who haven’t started this journey takes years to figure out what kind of birth control works for your body. Because birth control work differently for every single women . It is not a one size fits a. An example of this not one size fits all, your friend Tammy is on the IUD. She is not gaining weight and her period comes only twice a year. You’re also on the IUD, you have gained weight and your period lasted four weeks. It seems like you should go change your birth control method. Which is why you should go see your physician and talked about what other methods are available for you. Don’t ever stop trying to find the right method for you because it is your body and your in control of it.

I know when I started my journey to pick out the right birth control for me. I was taking the combination pill everyday for a year. I experienced shift in my intestines, that pain was unbearable cramp, but I still had a sex drive. With the Nuva ring I put a new one in every four weeks.  I experienced more panic attacks than ever before with the Ring and I also had some vaginal dryness and a decrease in my sex drive. Now that I am on a low dose pill which I have to take every day again.  My experience so far is that my acne is slowly going away and I’m short tempered.  I think.

The video below talks about a woman who has gone on this journey to find the right birth control for her. As usual I have some questions.

What are your thought about male birth control?

Should male birth control be on the market due to its “side effects”? Even though female birth control has these side effect.

Do you wish it was a one sizes fits all birth control?

What kind of side effect did you have while taking birth control that other women did not get?

 

 

Gender Pay Gap

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After watching this video from Vox I learned why women are paid less then men. Because when women become a mom. She is the primary care giver of her babies in society eyes. This means she is the one who has to take time off of work to take Timmy to the doctor. She is the one who has to get the kids up in the morning and arrives late to the office. When a man becomes a dad. He is the sole bread winner in society eyes. This means he stays late at the office finishing paper work even though he missed Timmy soccer game and Timmy is bummed out. Dads are not expected to take on the care giving role in society eyes because it is a “womens” job to do all the work. I think its is better for you to watch the video instead of me trying to describe it.

The Video from Vox is down below. Here are some questions to keep in mind.

Why isn’t there a womens discount? If women makes less money than men?

Is care giving a womens job?

What are your thoughts about working mom and stay at home moms?

How do you feel about Ice Land paid leave for moms and dads?

 

Feminism

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When you hear the word feminism? What do you image? What do you think? Do you imagine a butch woman with a buzz cut, wearing a flannel, combat boots, and cargo short? Do you think that all feminist are man haters? Yelling at men “We do not need you” as they stomp on him and steal his job. What you just imagine, and thought is wrong. Feminism is defined as the advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes. Basically, we want to be equal to men and be treated as a human being. This mean we want to get pay the same as men. What does a feminist look like? A feminist could look feminine, masculine, flamboyant, androgyny, and more. Also, too a feminist could look like me or you. It is sad when people think feminist, they think angry Butch women. I am just trying to get the same opportunities as man would. Sometimes I like wearing pants or a dress. It also breaks my small little heart when I hear woman say they are not feminist because people give it bad name.

Lets review, a feminist is a person who wants woman to have the same opportunities as men do. A feminist is not a manhater with a flannel shirt on. A feminist is you.

Imgur. “I Need Feminism Because…” Imgur, imgur.com/gallery/3Ifns.

First Female Of Color Vice President

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After many many years after our first black president back in 2008. We finally have our first female vice president of color in 2020. Think about how many girls of color are going dream of being the president now. I remember when I was young, living out that fantasy of being a female president in a video games. Now I think there is a chance that someday a woman is going to presidents, hopefully in my lifetime. With change there always comes some backlash. When Hilary Clinton was running against Trump in 2016. People where worried that she would blow up the world on her period. Mayo Clinic says, Menopause is the time that marks the end of your menstrual cycles. It’s diagnosed after you’ve gone 12 months without a menstrual period. Menopause can happen in your 40s or 50s, but the average age is 51 in the United States”{2} Hilary was 69 years old during that time, which meant she could no longer had periods. This equals to no Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) and no blowing the world up. Why can’t people admit women make better leaders than men look at the other countries who handle COVID-19 better because they had female leaders . 

Right now we’re living in lift changing history. I am happy to be apart of this and to witness the first female vice president of color. I say this a lot “Monkey say monkey do” Kids are watching all the time and dreaming one day they could be a singer like Selena, a superhero like Wonder Woman or Black Panther. It is all about representation and having dreams that touch the stars.

{1}Herndon, Astead W. “Kamala Harris: Who She Is and What She Stands For.” The New York Times, The New York Times, 10 Sept. 2019, www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/us/elections/kamala-harris.html.
{2} “Menopause.” Mayo Clinic, Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research, 14 Oct. 2020, www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/menopause/symptoms-causes/syc-20353397.

Gender Stereotypes

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The Man is off Taylor seventh album Lover, which is the first album Taylor has own. While her other albums are in the hands of Scooter Braun aka Justin Bieber manger. He has bought Taylor old record label Big Machine Records and has obtain all her masters, which are the original recording of songs. Scooter can do anything with her Masters because he owns them. If he wants too he can used Taylor music in a Wheaties commercial. This is why near the end of the video Taylor makes her mark and proves that this is her music video. Nobody can take it away from her. The Man music video also takes on a lot in its short life span. Can you spot all the stereotypes in this music video? Why do we embrace these stereotypes? If the roles were switch how would you feel?

Ageism

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After watching an episode of Blackish it got me thinking of the age-old stigma of older women dating younger men, and how we all think it is disgusting because she could be his mother. That we do not find it disgusting for an older man to be dating younger women. Older man is called a Manthers which are male cougars, have been introduced by to us in all forms of media. We are used to old men shacking up with younger women and we see nothing wrong with it. Look at Michael Douglas and his wife Catherine Zeta-Jones who is twenty-five years younger than him. Nobody bats an eye about that because it is the “norm” to have a younger woman date a much older guy. Take a look at Nick Jonas from the band Jonas Brothers. He marries Priyanka Chopra, a woman ten years older than him. Everybody freaks out, but why? I have some ideas,

Idea number one, society wants women to make babies when we’re young. It is what makes a woman a woman to produce off spring.Years ago, women had more kids, because some died of disease or health defects and some babies never got a names until they reached the age of two. Some women died giving due to the lack of health care in those days. Their husband remarried younger women to produce more offspring until they had a son, to take over the land. I think it is because women have a biological clock and can make babies for X amount of time. Women’s eggs are fertile when they are young. Meanwhile most men can make babies up until the day they die. So, if an older man hooks up with a younger woman, she can produce babies for him. It does not work the other way around depending on the age of the woman and if she is fertile. Some men will leave you for another woman, if a woman cannot make them babies. T.V always depicts this issue in its story line.

Idea number two, Societal expectations, older men are supposed to be the bread winner making money while having a stable career. That is beyond his female counterpart.He is supposed to be successful, in media he depict as this womanizer or workaholic, who gets the younger women. People see the younger women in his life as partners not toys.They call him lucky for scoring somebody so beautiful and young. When the roles are switch the older woman has the stable career making money. She is seen “as a bitch not a baller” as Taylor Swift said in her song The Man. Society does not like seeing older woman being successful, which is why is media she is depicting as the cranky boss, who cannot get a boyfriend at her “age”. Also, people see the younger men in her life not as her partners but as being her toys. They wonder if she can date somebody her own age. While the older man can date whoever he wants.

All of this is a magical thing called ageism which is a prejudice against someone age. That mostly attack women because we are supposed to stay this magical butterfly forever, we cannot get old, ever, and we have to act our age compared to our male counter parts.

Introductions

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Hello my name is Zaya Moreno. I am a writer/college student living in central Minnesota. I have a cactus named Inter, a succulent named Leafy, and a significant other, Roman who eats all the snacks in the house because, we are home all the time now. Coffee is my best friend and only friend because of the pandemic. I now spend more time in my office doing schoolwork without any social interaction besides Roman from the outside. Sometime I do not see him at all even though we are only nine feet away from each other. I am currently not okay at all. My sleep has suffered as well as my mental capacity, but the yearn to call things out during this unpresidential time is still there even if my left eye gets lazy. I am 82% here, I think.