If you have had a class with me, you may have experienced one of my “three things” exercises.  I like the number three.  It has been my “lucky” number since I was a kid.  I don’t really remember how it came to be, but it has stuck with me for many years.  I think it’s a good number.  One and two are too few and four and five are too many.  It’s easy to remember three things.  In keeping with my three things, I want to share with all of you three things that I am doing right now, or trying to do, to help me thrive (okay, maybe just barely survive) this global pandemic and the new reality we find ourselves living through.

Number One: Grace for yourself and others

People respond very differently in crisis. Some people thrive in chaotic and uncertain environments and others cave under the pressure.  It’s easy to be default to judgement and annoyance with others if they behave differently than you want or need them to.  It’s times like that when I need to replace my judgement with grace. The definition of grace is “courteous goodwill.”  I switch my default to assuming that people are doing the best they can right now as it is not my place to judge during difficult moments. By extending people goodwill, I also am able to remove negative energy from myself.

Equally as important is extending grace to yourself.

If you are a highly motivated individual, and you find yourself just staring out of the window and feeling unproductive, allow yourself the space and grace to not achieve and accomplish at the same level pre-crisis.  My new motto is do what you can, when you can.

Number Two: Acknowledge Perspective

Perspective is a function of experience.  The more experience we have, the more capable we are to put this hardship in perspective.  That experience doesn’t necessarily mean in years, just in life.  If someone is devastated by not being able to walk in graduation, and you could care less, both of those views are okay.  When my child is upset because she will miss her dance recital this year, my immediate perspective is that she will have many other dance performances.  But for her, a 15-year-old, who has worked very hard over the last four months to prepare for the recital, this is a big deal.

We need to be able to acknowledge others’ perspectives and share that we understand what it’s like to work hard for something and it doesn’t happen.  We can also share that we are sad to be unable to witness the fruits of out friends and family’s  hard work. We can then just let it be. It is not on us try and change peoples’ perspectives. Instead, we can trust that  this experience will expand all of our world views and we can use our survival to reframe our perspectives when something else hard comes along.

Number Three:  Identify Grief

Grief is an emotion that happens when we lose something or someone.  And everyone in the world right now is experiencing loss of some sort.  We have lost people we love, jobs, freedom, opportunities, dreams, plans, and memories.  The world as we know it is instantaneously different and we were not prepared for the complete change in how we live.  This can make grief overwhelming.

Sometimes we diminish our own grief because we feel someone is suffering more.  Now is not a time for comparative suffering.  Regardless of what each of us feel we have lost; we are allowed to grieve.  Indeed, there is a place for each of us to take inventory of what we are grateful for but it is also acceptable to be very sad and acknowledge what we have lost.  Our culture is very tied to ritual and many of our rituals that serve as endpoints or beginnings are not available to us.  It is okay to sit with this grief.

Life is hard right now; AND, we can do hard things.  Extend grace, acknowledge perspective, and identify your grief.  Be gentle with yourself and others and try to keep these three things in mind.

I wish you all health and healing.


Jennifer B. Jones, Ph.D. is a faculty member in the St. Cloud State Higher Education Administration program.

 

368 thoughts on “Three Tips for Thriving (or Surviving) in COVID-19

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  8. The staff at London’s Dandelyan bar clearly didn’t rest on their
    laurels after coming second in the World’s Best Bar Awards 2017.

    Because it has been named the best bar in the world in 2018, MailOnline Travel can exclusively reveal.

    The Perrier-sponsored World’s 50 Best Bars awards was held in a glittering
    ceremony at London’s iconic Roundhouse today – and it’s London that dominates this year’s list,
    with U.S watering holes also featuring heavily in the prestigious ranking.

    Cheers! London’s Dandelyan bar, pictured, has been named the best bar
    in the world in 2018 

    Dandelyan, which is housed in the luxury Mondrian hotel,
    debuted on the top 50 list at No.50 in 2015, then jumped to No3 in 2016.
    It was created by forward-thinking cocktail creator and bartender Ryan Chetiyawardana

    Two of Dandelyan’s cocktail creations, left and right.
    The focus of Dandelyan is ‘to bring a stylish neighbourhood
    vibe to the glamour of the Mondrian Hotel on London’s Southbank, with sustainability and nature to the fore’. Since opening in September 2014, Dandelyan has launched five cocktail menus all with a focus on botany

    And there was much rejoicing: The Dandelyan team celebrate their bar being named the world’s
    best at London’s Roundhouse

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    Hitting the right notes: Last year’s No.1, American Bar at The Savoy, pictured,
    now claims the No.2 position 

    The staff at American Bar pose proudly in front of the bar.
    It’s said to be one of the most historically important bars open today

    The cocktails at the American Bar almost count as works of art.
    This one is called Curtain Call

    Dandelyan, which is housed in the luxury Mondrian hotel, debuted on the top
    50 list at No.50 in 2015, then jumped to No3 in 2016.

    Created by forward-thinking cocktail creator and bartender Ryan Chetiyawardana, the
    focus of Dandelyan is ‘to bring a stylish neighbourhood vibe to the glamour of the Mondrian Hotel
    on London’s Southbank, with sustainability and nature to the
    fore’.

    Since opening in September 2014, Dandelyan has launched five cocktail menus all with a focus on botany.

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    This week Mr Chetiyawardana posted a message on social media in which he explained that the bar will soon be ‘killed off’
    and reborn on the same site with the same team but as a
    reinvented concept. 

    Overall, London celebrates 10 bars on the 2018 list, welcoming four newcomers –
    Scout (No.28), Three Sheets (No.29), Swift (No.46) and Coupette (No.18), which also wins the Best New Opening Award, sponsored by Thomas Henry.

    Connaught Bar (No.5) also receives the Heering Legend of the List title, which recognises the bar
    that has performed most consistently over the 10-year history of the list.
    Last year’s No.1, American Bar at The Savoy, now claims the No.2 position, while established London destinations including Bar Termini (No.6), Oriole (No.17) and Happiness Forgets (No.35) also remain on the list.

    The US boasts 10 bars on the list with The NoMad (No.4) in New York crowned Best
    Bar in North America sponsored by Michter’s Distillery, for
    the second consecutive year. New York’s Dante cracks the top
    10, climbing seven places to No.9, while Employees Only jumps 11 places
    back to No.26. The city’s impressive line-up is completed by Attaboy (No.15), The Dead Rabbit (No.16), and
    BlackTail (No.41).

    The US boasts 10 bars on the list with The NoMad (No.4) in New York crowned Best Bar in North America sponsored
    by Michter’s Distillery, for the second consecutive year 

    The bar staff at The NoMad work their magic. The bar’s website says:
    ‘Award-winning Bar Director Leo Robitschek has created a
    beverage program that celebrates classically-focused cocktails,
    while delving into two new arenas: festive, large-format drinks and
    a selection of reserve cocktails crafted with rare spirits.
    An extensive selection of both approachable and sought-after wines and
    beers are available as well’

    New York’s Dante, pictured, cracks the top 10, climbing seven places to No.9,
    while Employees Only jumps 11 places back to No.26.
    The city’s impressive line-up is completed by Attaboy (No.15), The Dead Rabbit (No.16),
    and BlackTail (No.41) 

    San Francisco is represented by two bars: Tommy’s (No.40) and Trick Dog (No.44).
    Chicago celebrates a new entry on to the list with the debut of
    Lost Lake at No.50. Miami’s Sweet Liberty climbs six places
    to No.21 with the industry paying special tribute to John Lermayer, one of its
    founders who sadly passed away earlier this year, with
    the Industry Icon Award, sponsored by Seedlip.

    Spain also has plenty to celebrate this year with two
    new entries on the list. Paradiso from Barcelona enters the top 50 at No.37, having been named the One To Watch in 2017, while
    Salmon Guru from Madrid enters at No.47 – a significant jump following its debut at No.82 in 2017.

    The city of Paris is represented by three bars again this year with Le Syndicat
    jumping an impressive 10 places to No.24. Little Red Door now
    sits at No.33 and Candelaria at No.42.

    Miami’s Sweet Liberty, pictured, climbs six places to No.21 with the industry
    paying special tribute to John Lermayer, one of its
    founders who sadly passed away earlier this year, with the Industry Icon Award, sponsored by Seedlip

    Sweet Liberty’s interior is definitely on the hip side –
    it’s an industrial twist on the classic sixties diner
    theme

    San Francisco is represented in the top 50 list by two bars: Tommy’s (No.40) and Trick
    Dog (No.44). In this image the staff of Tommy’s express their gratitude for
    featuring in the ranking – and remind San Franciscans how
    lucky they are to have them

    Chicago celebrates a new entry on to the list with the debut of Lost Lake, pictured, at No.50 

    Singapore leads Asia’s ranking with five bars featured.
    Manhattan (No.3) enters the top three and claims the title of Best Bar
    in Asia, sponsored by Hennessy. Singapore is also represented by Atlas (No.8), Operation Dagger (No.23)
    and 28 HongKong Street (No.34), while Native jumps
    34 places to No.13 to take the Highest Climber Award, sponsored by Nikka Whisky. 

    To add to the city-state’s accolades, Singapore-based bartender Joe Schofield, recently of Tippling Club (No.58)
    and now heading the Sensorium project, has been named the Altos
    Bartenders’ Bartender for his ground-breaking flavour
    developments.

    La Factoría in Old San Juan, Puerto Rico, comes in at No.36, while Mexico City’s
    Licorería Limantour climbs to an impressive No.11.
    Fifty Mils, also located in the Mexican capital,
    enters the ranking at No.45.

    Florería Atlántico (No.14) from Buenos Aires, Argentina, is named Best Bar in South America, sponsored by Asahi.
    Joining the success in South America is Carnaval in Lima, Peru (No.68), which takes home the Campari One To
    Watch Award.

    Licorería Limantour, pictured, in Mexico City is the eleventh
    best bar in the world, according to this year’s awards

    Florería Atlántico (No.14), pictured, in Buenos Aires, Argentina,
    is named Best Bar in South America

    Sante! Le Syndicat, pictured, in Paris, is the highest-ranking French bar
    on the list

    The exterior of Le Syndicat certainly gives nothing away about the cocktail-making magic that goes
    on inside

    Singapore leads Asia’s ranking with five bars featured.

    Manhattan (No.3), pictured, enters the top three and claims the title of Best Bar in Asia 

    The exterior of Manhattan certainly makes a statement. You know you’re entering a classy establishment as you cross the threshold

    Atlas, pictured, in Singapore ranks No8 on the list. But
    its interior is surely the grandest of them all

    Drinkers at Atlas can quaff away in surroundings that are fit for royalty. To add to Singapore’s accolades, Singapore-based bartender Joe Schofield, recently of Tippling Club (No.58) and now
    heading the Sensorium project, has been named
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  9. This is certainly one way to make your ex-boyfriend realise he is being an ass.

    Kate Hudson works hard at keeping in tip top shape,
    and clearly she is not afraid to use her fantastic physique to ensure she gets her way.

    A source revealed to US Weekly that after the 36-year-old’s
    new boyfriend Nick Jonas decided to call it quits on their relationship, the star brought out her now not-so-secret
    weapon – her pert derriere.

    Scroll down for video 

    Oh la, la: Kate Hudson reportedly had her stylist post
    this picture of her to make beau Nick Jonas jealous after they split

    The source revealed to the magazine that back in November when the actress and her
    23-year-old love interest were once again on a break she decided to make him jealous by showing him – and the world – what
    he was missing.

    Us reports the Almost Famous star had her stylist Sophie Lopez snap and then post a Polaroid picture of
    her naked in a bathtub on Instagram.

    The stylist then captioned the snap: ‘#JustAnotherDayAtTheOffice.’

    A seemingly shocked but not concerned Kate responded: ‘Omg!
    You’re so fired! #Fabletics.’

    See more Kate Hudon updates as she bares her bottom on Instagram 

    Took notice: Nick (pictured January 8) must have
    fallen for the sexy snap trick as the pair seen together earlier this month on a ski trip

    Still going: While initially believed to
    be having just a summer fling, the pair have taken their romance into the winter months and
    were spotted at a coffee shop in Mammoth Lakes, California
    (pictured)

    Seems the sexy suds snap worked, as Kate and Nick were seen together earlier this month on a ski trip.

    While initially believed to be having just a summer fling, the pair have taken their romance into
    the winter months and were spotted at a coffee shop in Mammoth Lakes,
    California.

    Kate has, however, denied she is in love with the Jealous singer.

    At this month’s Golden Globes Access Hollywood’s Billy Bush asked the star
    if she was in love wi9th Nick.

    And even though she initially told the newsman to ‘stop it,’ she eventually said, ‘No.
    Friendly.’ 

    ‘Friendly’: The actress denied she was in love with Nick when asked
    at this year’s Golden Globes (pictured)

     

     

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